Posts Tagged ‘Dean Winchester’

I’ve been discussing this quite a lot with friends recently. Mostly because I enjoy talking about the villains of my favorite fandoms (I dunno who I love more… Loki, the Joker, the Master or Lucifer… Or Hannibal. Can I have them all?). A common idea that keeps popping up, however is that Supernatural’s most infamous and evil villain is God.

Disclaimer: Please note that I am speaking ONLY of the character of God in the television series “Supernatural” and not any actual religious deity. This post in no way reflects my opinions on religion, Christianity, or God.

Let me break it down a little bit (though I’m sure some of you can already see what I’m saying):

The biggest villains in Supernatural were as follows: demons and angels.

Demons only exist because Lucifer rebelled. Lucifer rebelled because God expected him to bow to humanity, which is clearly flawed logical because angels are über awesome.

Azazel killed Samuel and Diana Campbell to get Mary to make a deal for her son. He needed her to make that deal so he could infect Sam with his demon blood and get Sam to open Lucifer’s cage twenty some-odd years later. (It was a very thorough and LONG master plan, after all.)

Lucifer broke out of his Cage because who wants to be stuck in a Cage for eternity? Lucifer used Sam to free himself because it was all part of the Plan. It was all part of the Plan because God said so.

Michael brought Adam back from the dead and used him as bait to get Dean to say yes. Dean’s a stubborn ass and Adam gets the short end of the deal. Why did Michael even WANT Dean as his vessel? BECAUSE GOD SAID SO.

God knew all along that Lucifer would rebel and what it would all lead to… yet did nothing to prevent it and let Lucifer turn Lilith into a demon, thereby cementing his fate and the fate of every other living thing. God forced Michael to cast his own brother (someone Michael clearly cared about) into Hell because of this disobedience rather than KILLING LUCIFER LIKE HE TOTALLY COULD HAVE.

God then promptly ditched the angels, leaving them to their own devices. When Sam and Dean went to him, asking for help stopping Lucifer he said it wasn’t his problem. Yet he CREATED the problem. He had enough forethought to CREATE the plan to fix it, though that plan ensured that Sam and Dean and their family never be happy or have normal, healthy lives.

When Dean was in Hell, God could have gotten him out before he broke. He’s God. He can do anything. He could’ve saved Dean. When Sam was in Hell, God could’ve gotten him out – with his soul. Again, he’s God. He can do that. Hell, when Ruby was manipulating Sam, God could’ve intervened and killed her. He could’ve stopped Lilith. He could’ve killed Lucifer. He could’ve returned to Heaven and straightened his CHILDREN up, putting an end to their “Let’s burn the entire earth” nonsense.

Really, aside from getting Sam and Dean out of that church (and repeatedly forcing Castiel to die and return to life, each time worse than the last for the poor angel) WHAT has God done to assist in cleaning up the utter mess he STARTED.

He made Lucifer. Lucifer rebelled and created demons. God created Hell and made Michael cast Lucifer into it. Lucifer got pissed, decided to destroy all of humanity to show God how wrong he was. Michael got bitter because his brother was stubborn and wouldn’t realized that “daddy knows best”. Gabriel hightailed because his family sucks. God ran away because I guess the pressure of totally being the biggest asshole ever just get to you or something.

 God not only created the problem and did very little to correct it (even though, if he had truly wanted to, he COULD HAVE), he actively avoided fixing the problem and instead decided to use two humans – thereby destroying THEIR lives as well as ruining the angels’ existence – to end the world and/or possibly save everyone.

I highly doubt Lucifer, Azazel or any of the angels or demons would’ve gone after Sam and Dean if they hadn’t KNOWN that it was all supposed to end with them on opposite sides of the final showdown between Heaven and Hell.

The argument could be made that God helped them (as the heavy implication that Chuck is God would suggest) to avoid ending the world, but he didn’t exactly do much considering he’s an all-powerful God, now did he? He could destroy everything and everyone with a thought. He could have stopped Lucifer, he could’ve stopped Michael, he could’ve stopped Raphael.

Hell, in season 6 Castiel prays for guidance on the Purgatory issue and God could’ve at the very least shown him something to let him know how dangerous and wrong the path he was on was at that time, but he didn’t. He did absolutely nothing.

And I’m not particularly fond of the “but he gave them freewill” argument either. God’s actions cannot be justified in the show with that simple statement. He had the opportunity to help, he was asked for guidance and gave none, he abandoned his children and humanity, he ruined the Winchesters’ lives and he knew it was going to happen exactly that way.

So yeah, God’s the biggest asshole in SPN.

Oh wow, look at that! I’m not dead. I’m really sorry for the extreme gap between posts. I haven’t been able to actually get on WordPress outside of a mobile device lately because my personal laptop is on the fritz. *sigh* That, and life is hectic. I just started a new semester (only one more to go!) and I’ve been writing (both fanfics and original work) and reading a LOT. Not to mention I started sporking City of Fallen Angels by Cassandra Clare last month on my FB and slogging through Jace’s bullshit is actually becoming painful.

But anyway. I actually have access to a computer (in campus computer lab) and I’m going to actually give you guys a post for a change! I know, I know. Shocking.

So today’s topic of discussion: Dean’s sexuality.

For the record, I personally believe that Dean Winchester is bisexual. Please note that I do not believe this simply because I’m an avid slash fan or a very proud Destiel shipper. I love Dean and Cas as friends and frankly, though I enjoy entertaining the thought that they’d have sexually romantic relationship, I’m not going to delude myself into thinking either of them would actually do that. That doesn’t change my thoughts on Dean’s sexuality, however. And I’m going to tell you why.

Many people who don’t believe that Dean is gay or bisexual cite Dean’s womanizing ways as proof of his heterosexuality. I’m going to use it for my own argument though.

Dean was raised in a very masculine environment, trained to do the things “real men” should do. John was a very strict military man and while he wasn’t in the marine corps. when Dean was growing up, he still held those ideals and convictions. I doubt Dean would ever feel comfortable admitting to himself, let alone his father, that he found men attractive. And so of course he would try to compensate for that, telling himself that of course he isn’t gay because he clearly likes women. It became a way for Dean to push down those others thoughts and feelings.

If you’ve noticed, in the earlier seasons Dean was very self-conscious and a lot of his self-worth was tied into what his father thought of him. He wouldn’t want to do anything to jeopardize his image in John’s eyes. He flirted with women, he had lots of random, casual sex with women and rarely had any fulfilling, committed relationships with women.

Dean hated himself. Let’s not argue about that, because it’s canon. He truly felt unworthy, unwanted or downright useless at times and there was a point where he believed he deserved to go to Hell. Questioning his sexuality, among the angst of trying to find himself outside of his father’s ideas, certainly would have added to that.

And since Dean’s return from Hell he’s expressed more romantic inclinations – like his relationship with Lisa. I personally think that Dean wanted that relationship to work more than anything. He put effort into it like he never really had in a romantic relationship and was content for a while, until it fell apart.

As the seasons have gone by and Dean’s learned to accept himself – though, clearly he still has some issues with his self-worth – he’s become more open. In the early years when someone suggested he was gay, Dean would make a smartass retort, turn it into a joke or balk at it disbelieving and wonder how they could think such a thing.

Now, as we saw in “Everybody Hates Hitler”, he is more awkward and sort of dorky as he tries to work his way through the situation of being flirted with by another man. He doesn’t make flippant remarks, immediately deny the accuse of him being gay. Instead, he acts very much like he does when he is flirting seriously. The way he acted with Aaron was very reminiscent of the way he acted around Cassie (season 1, “Route 666”) and Lisa throughout the early episodes of their relationship (mostly in season 3).

It feels very much like Dean is gradually beginning to come into himself. He has stopped seeing himself in terms of what his father (or Sam or Bobby or anyone else) would see him and has started to see himself just as who he is and who he wants to be. He’s happier with himself than he’s ever been – in spite of his belief that he is merely a “grunt”, he seems to have a healthier opinion of himself as a whole.

I could be reading more into this than is really there, but I truly hope that they continue to explore this side of Dean and his newfound confidence in himself. Even if it doesn’t lead to him coming to terms with his sexuality they way I believe he should, I do hope they’ll at least explore Dean’s self-worth and growing confidence in the coming season. It would certainly be an interesting arc.

We haven’t really gone too deep into Dean’s own personal feels in the last couple of seasons and nothing much about his self-worth (at least not at any great length) since season 3. I’d like for them to do that in season nine. Actually, I’d like to see more of that for Sam, Dean and Cas. Season eight did a wonderful job of setting up some very intriguing arcs for all of the characters and I hope that they don’t drop the ball on exploring them once season nine gets here.

Before I get started, I’d like to first apologize again for my lack of posting. Busy summer, no laptop and unforseen real life events make it harder to write posts than I would like. Forgive me.

And also: please note that while I love Supernatural, I am not above complaining about what I didn’t like and season 3 falls under the “what I didn’t like” category. Not that I hate season 3, it’s decent enough, but it was not as good as the two previous seasons or the seasons that follow it. I avoid watching season 3 in its entirety as often as possible. (I’ve only watched it all the way through 3 times compared to the four or five times I’ve watched all the other seasons…)

So I figured since we’re on hiatus waiting for season 9, I’d just sit here and bitch about things until I get new episodes to sob over. Savvy?

One of the bigger issues I have with season three is the storyline. I feel like it wasn’t enough to spend a whole season on. I get that Dean going to Hell was a big fricking deal and I definitely understand the focus, but there weren’t nearly as many diverse episodes that season – it was nearly all demons. It makes sense with the release of the demons, but it was still repeating things we’d already seen and was frankly not as interesting.

Basically, not enough happened. I’m sure the writer’s strike that year really hurt the show – it’s probably a bigger factor in the season’s poor performance than anything. But I’m not inclined to be too forgiving.

They could’ve done more. So much more, but they didn’t.

They cleared up the Gordon issue – excellently, sure, but ultimately that sucked some tension out of the show. I was glad to see Gordon gone, but disappointed that we never saw any other hunters aside from the ones trying to kill Sam with Gordon or the two at the very beginning.

Where were the other hunters? Hundreds of demons were let loose and we didn’t hear one friggin’ peep out of more than a handful of hunters at best. That is just stupid. We should have heard way more about other hunters. Like, say Ellen and Jo? Remember those people? Because they made not one single appearance in season 3 and in fact vanished entirely until season 5 where they were killed off.

It was a brilliant opportunity to play with the whole hunter world and expand it a bit – it’s something we so rarely see on the show. I’d like for there to be more hunters and more run-ins with other hunters. It’d be interesting.

And can we please talk about why it was necessary for Bela Talbot to be part of the show? I hated that bitch.

She was cold, self-centered, greedy, bitchy and horrible. I never liked her. She had no moral compass, no goals past looking out solely for herself and she was annoyingly Mary-Sueish. She was just so fucking “badass” that it hurt because she wasn’t.

And don’t even bring up the abuse storyline they shoehorned in there right at the end because I don’t care. I know people who were abused, I understand that it is terrible and it will scar someone and I don’t blame Bela for having her parents killed and she doesn’t deserve to go to Hell over something like that.

However, that doesn’t excuse her from being a horrible human being. So she had a shitty, awful, tragic background. A lot of people do and they don’t use it as an excuse to be total dickbags to everyone around them. Bela’s past was awful, apparently (since we only get that tiny little glimpse designed to force us to empathize) but that doesn’t mean she has a right to treat everyone like shit.

She has NO EXCUSE for how she behaves. She is greedy and self-serving and that’s not the bi-products of a scarred young woman, that’s the psychopathic personality she has. I’m seriously wondering why the writers included her at all because she was utterly pointless.

Sure she affected the plot, but remove her and they could’ve found otherways for them to lose the Colt and for Gordon to find them. That’s about the only part of the plot she really effected anyway.

The saddest part is that I could’ve liked Bela, if she’d been given a better personality and wasn’t so damn cold and flat. Written properly, a character like her could have been fantastic and interesting and dynamic and deep. She was cold and flat right up until she died and then they tried to make her into a tragic character. It did not work.

Something else that bugs me about season three: the end of the Henricksen storyline. Hear me out, I love the episode “Jus in Bello”, I do. It’s one of my favorites. However, I was disappointed that they ended the Henricksen storyline there and the threat of the FBI altogether for a while.

They closed that subplot too quickly with Henricksen’s death and Sam and Dean’s supposed death. It, like the subplot with Gordon, sucked out some of the tension. I mean, we still had Dean going to Hell, but I liked the FBI subplot. I enjoyed Henricksen’s character and I was not happy that he died so soon after learning the truth.

There was so much potential in that character. Imagine Sam and Dean having a real FBI agent on their side. Imagine them having a contact within the FBI. That would have been amazing. Henricksen could help them cover their tracks, alert them to weird cases, etc. It would have been awesome. And they could still kill him off later, maybe working some case with the Winchesters, where his death would have a bigger impact once we’d gotten to know him better.

I’d have appreciated more Henricksen, is what I’m saying.

Overall those, as I said, my real issue is that the season went mostly like this: demons, demons, demons, demons, random case, demons, save Dean from hell, demons, demons, Dean’s in Hell, ha ha you all lose.

So anyway, that’s the gist of what I feel about season three.

And to prove that I’m not a horribly cynical person, there are things I liked about the season:

Ruby. She was badass and basically the demon version of what Bela could have been if she’d been written better.

Sam’s struggle with trying to save Dean and be strong for him and his gradual shift in character. That was perfect and wonderful and really set up the following seasons perfectly and established Sam’s character arc nicely.

Dean’s struggle to accept that he didn’t deserve Hell and his attitude toward the whole thing.

And of course, the Trickster episode, “Mystery Spot”, because, duh.

And remember: these are my opinions. I’m allowed to have them, but you’re allowed to disagree with them.

Sorry I haven’t posted anything in a while guys! I was just a teeny bit completely distracted by NBC’s glorious Hannibal. (If you haven’t seen it, save your soul. It will do horrible, twisted things to you…) And my laptop screen is busted, plus fixing some issues with my classes next Fall and my brother graduating high school. I’ve been busy. (Who knew I had a life…)

Anyway. I want to talk about Fanfiction today, specifically, Supernatural Fanfiction.

I feel like Fanfiction gets a bit of a bad reputation, which is probably at least a bit deserved because holy mother of Lucifer, I’ve read some really horrible things in Fanfiction archives. But sometimes you want to read the bad stuff. Or at least, I do. It makes me feel better about my writing. And there are tons of good stories too, and also every now and then you’ll stumble onto something so beautiful it’ll make you cry.

So, here are my Fanfiction Dos and Don’ts for the brilliantness of the Supernatural fandom.

(Also, a brief disclaimer: these are my opinions on these matters. If you happen to love anything I say is a definite Don’t, please don’t take offense because you can write or read whatever you want. I’m just explaining my issues with the SPN fanfictions I see)

Crossovers: Do. Absolutely do. I have a serious love of crossovers. With Supernatural, my favorites are the Superwholock stories. Because I’m a huge nerd and don’t judge me, it’s awesome. (For those sad people who don’t know, Superwholock is Supernatural, Doctor Who and Sherlock.)

Wincest: DON’T. Not ever. I hate every single form of Wincest. Incest is fucking gross people, I don’t care how hot Jared and Jensen are, when they are playing Sam and Dean they are brothers and I don’t even want to entertain the thought of it.

Destiel: Oh please do. Dean and Cas’ “profound bond” is absolutely adorable and I swear, one day Dean will realize that he’s a total dick and realize that Cas is in love with him. It’s just a given.

Serial Killer AUs: Do. For anyone unfamiliar, this is where the supernatural element of SPN is taken out and Sam and Dean are actual serial killers. I love AUs and I love the idea of Sam and Dean being serial killers for real. Dean especially really fits the profile of a serial killer. (I watch too many crime shows… *shrugs*)

Angel Incest: Blarg. In case my tiny rant about Wincest wasn’t clear enough: DON’T. I don’t care if they’re angels, it’s still disgusting. They’re fucking angels people. Angels don’t HAVE sex. At least the majority. Anna did because she was human-ish then and she specifically mention sex being something angels don’t have. Gabriel did because he’s fucking Gabriel. And Balthazar did because fuck the rules. And none of them screwed another angel because THEY’RE FAMILY. Ew.

Gender Bending: Don’t. Gender bending is pretty obviously where you take a character and change their gender. Usually it’s male to female. In SPN, it’s more often than not Sam. But it doesn’t matter because the point of gender bending is to change the character’s gender and keep their personality, but more often than not, the female version is just a generic version of a female original character – usually an author insert. So let’s stop with the gender bending and call a spade a spade. You’re a shitty writer if you do it because you want two characters to have sex but you don’t want to write gay sex. Anyway. Just, don’t. Unless it’s done by, like, a spell or a curse or something and is played for laughs and the character retains their actual personality, it’s just not good.

MPreg: Don’t. Please don’t. MPreg is when a dude gets pregnant. It’s usually very poorly written, though I admit I’ve read a couple of good ones. Generally, author’s don’t bother explaining just how the fuck a guy got pregnant and seem to have set their story in an AU world where guys just get pregnant all the time. It’s bizarre. And gross. And I’m really not a fan.

Giving Sam and Dean a little sister: Why the fuck would you do that? Don’t, obviously. It’s ridiculous. Sam and Dean don’t need a sister. If you want to add a third party to their hunting duo, how about Adam? You know, their actual brother? That guy they left to rot in Hell?

Weechester: Absolutely do. Weechester is basically writing pre-series stories where Sam and Dean are kids. And they are often adorable, sometimes heartbreaking but oh so wonderful. It’s like an extended flashback of awesome when they’re done right. I love Weechester fics.

Adding any new hunters in and pairing them with Sam or Dean: Don’t you fucking dare. That is so annoying. No one wants to read about your fantasies about hunting with the Winchesters and one of them falling for you. NO ONE. Look, 90% of us have those sort of stories in our heads, but we don’t all inflict them on other people so don’t you do it either. It’s annoying. It’s really annoying.

Any Romance at all: Meh. This is an iffy one. I hate romance, especially in Fanfiction where most of the authors have no idea how to write it. However, there are some really good ones out there. I say, as long as it involves two canonical characters and isn’t incest, go for it. I don’t care who you pair together, even if it’s Crowley and Cas (dude, that’d be kinda awesome). Romance can be interesting if it’s written correctly. So it’s a do/don’t because it’s so easily fucked up.

Stanford Era: Do. These fics are so interesting. I love reading about the Stanford era stuff and when they’re done write they’re amazing.

Character Death: Do. It’s SPN. You cannot escape character death and I have grown into a twisted person who is a total masochist. So kill off whoever the hell you want, even Sam if you want.

Character Bashing: I’d avoid it if I were you. There are plenty of characters in SPN I want to tear a new one, but writing them grossly out of character to demonstrate how horrible they are isn’t going to get you anywhere. Sometimes it’s okay, but generally it’s something to avoid. If you really hate the character, just have them brutally killed. It’s what I tend to do with Amelia.

Secretly Genius Dean: Please don’t. I can understand the appeal, but don’t. Dean isn’t a genius. He’s not stupid, but he’s not fucking Einstein. He’s got a GED and he’s more comfortable quoting movies than philosophers. I’m not saying it’s a bad thing; it’s part of who Dean is. It’ feels like a huge breech of his character to have Dean doing calculus or trig or something. He doesn’t like school. It bored him. He’s not an idiot, but he’s not interested in being books smart. He has practical smarts, no need to know anything that he can just have Sam Google or research for him.

And finally:

Samifer: DO. There can never be enough Samifer. Just make sure it’s not all lovey-dovey, happy shit because that relationship is fucked up in a thousand beautiful ways. It hurts so good. Seriously.

So there you have it. Some of my Fanfiction Dos and Don’ts. Not really sorry if I offended anyone. Like I said, you’re totally entitled to disagree with anything I said. They’re just my opinions and I’m hardly the Fanfiction God or anything.

If you want to read some great fanfics, I have a small sample of those here. And if you’re interested in reading my SPN fanfics, you can find those here.

I have officially survived more than a week after the Supernatural finale. I find that to be a miracle considering that last Saturday I watched the Doctor Who finale and Thursday was the Elementary finale and this Wednesday was the Criminal Minds finale that SPOILER ALERT killed off a character they were just starting to develop properly. Those bastards.

But anyway, what I want to talk about today is the fact that I’ve been having these really aggravating arguments with people and was recently called a hypocrite BY MY OWN MOTHER for the way I act about Supernatural.

Basically, the gist of the story is: I despise Twilight with the white-hot intensity of a thousand suns. And I am vocal about that hatred. Then, someone said that they thought the recent season of Supernatural was stupid and the storyline was idiotic. I flipped my shit, guys, I will not lie. It utterly pissed me off. I didn’t flip out on the person who said it, but I did rant about it for a while to my brother and my mom overheard and told me I was getting upset for someone doing the same thing that I do to Twilight.

That made me stop and think because I never, EVER want to be compared to the crazy Twilight fangirls that scare the shit out of me.

Look, to be clear, everyone can have their own opinion and I get that there are people who just don’t like Supernatural. I can even accept that there are people who legitimately like Twilight. If everyone had the same opinions the world would be boring.

However, I do have to defend myself a bit: yes, I am a totally insane fangirl and yes, if you insult the fandoms I am a part of I will be very quick to argue my points. But the thing is, I LIKE arguing with people about that stuff. Not screaming, yelling, tossing insults, etc. of course. Just a good debate.

The difference between me and the fangirls I don’t like is that I won’t tell someone that they’re an idiot simply because they say that they don’t like something I happen to adore.

In the case of Supernatural, there are many fans who don’t like to hear negative things said about the show, but I’m not one of them. Hell, I think I rant enough about the show that some people probably have to wonder why I’m so in love with. There are things about the show that I despise with such intensity that thinking about them upsets me.

I can go on for hours about the shitty things I hate Dean for doing, about the stupid choices Sam has made and about how much John Winchester pissed me off. Yet, I love them all.

I’m not one of those fangirls who thinks my fandom is above reproach. I don’t think Supernatural is perfect. What I do think, however, is that it is brilliant. I think the show is a lot deeper than some people think. I think the storyline (especially this season) is unique and beautiful. I think the relationship between Sam and Dean is amazing. I think Supernatural has some of the best actors ever on their show. I think the special effects are phenomenal. (And have improved dramatically since season 1.) I think the beauty of the show is that despite its flaws, it’s still remarkable and tells a story people are interested in. A story that I am very much in love with, with characters I care about.

I want people to stop assuming that being part of a fandom means that fangirls are the devotedly insane type of people who will bite your hand off for insulting their favorite character.

Seriously, go ahead and tell me how much you hate Sam Winchester. I have a very close friend who actually despises Sam to the point that she will write fanfictions with him being tortured just because. She’s a bit twisted, mind you, but it doesn’t bother me. In fact, we have some interesting debates about the show and other fandoms because we actually don’t agree on much of anything except that we love the shows.

I enjoy those kind of debates, talking about the nature of characters and what their choices mean and whether or not they were a “bad” character. It’s interesting and I learn things doing that.

Basically, what I’m saying is: I might be overly protective of my fandoms, I might get upset when someone goes to a site dedicated to loving the show and says it’s stupid, but if you’ve got actual reasons backing you up and aren’t just an idiotic troll, then I completely and utterly do not care that you have a differing opinion.

No one can convince me that Supernatural isn’t awesome, but then again, I doubt I could convince someone that it IS awesome if they’re so deadest on hating it so there’s that.

I think I’m done now… I need to go prepare myself for watching the re-run of “As Time Goes By” tonight. Because I’m a masochist and I wanna rip open the scars.

Now that I’ve had some time to recover I think it’s time to take a look back at season 8… (Note that when I say “recover” I mostly just mean I ran out of tears. I’m still reeling from the finale)

I can say honestly that season 8 is my new favorite season. I admit, there are aspects of it that I am still not happy with (like, say, Amelia) but all the same, it was a brilliant, heartbreaking, turbulent rollercoaster ride of awesomeness and badassery like we haven’t really seen in a while.

I have never not loved Supernatural, but I will admit that season 6 was a bit of a mess story-wise and season 7 (while wonderful) had more than its share of moments that made me wanna punch things. (Of course, if we’re looking at all the seasons, nothing in the show is worse than season 3…)

Anyway, this season really took the show somewhere new and also brought back some of the old spark that was the reason I fell in love with it in the first place.

Specifically, I’m talking about Sam and Dean and their relationship.

I don’t know if anyone noticed, but after season 5, Sam and Dean didn’t seem as close. Not that they didn’t care about each other, but there were less brother moments, there was more tension and fighting and very little of the brotherly banter in the first few seasons.

But this season really delivered on the Brotherly Love scale. We got to see Sam and Dean like they haven’t been in a long time. Sure, they were fighting (especially in the beginning when Dean was angry at Sam for not looking for him in Purgatory) but they still looked out for each other and their love for each other really became the focus of the season like it hasn’t been in far too long.

Sam’s struggle with the trials, Dean’s struggle to be there for him even when he couldn’t really do anything about what was going on really reminded me a lot of season 2, when they were freaked out about what was happening to Sam because of the YED.

And the finale… Oh god, the scene where Sam tells Dean about his biggest sin. You guys, I was crying buckets. It was so heartbreaking and so beautiful and it really was just so perfect. I was so happy they had that scene because they needed that scene. The last couple of seasons didn’t give us those kinds of scenes like they used to.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: Supernatural never fails to surprise me. Just when I think I have things figured out, they change the rules on me.

I was sure that the trials would kill Sam. I was sure of it like I haven’t been sure of anything in a long time. And the worst part is, I was right, but Sam still didn’t die. I totally expected Sam to die in the finale and I have to say and I was pleasantly surprised that not one of the main characters died. We still have Sam, Dean AND Cas.

I said I wanted them to do something different for the finale this year and they did. And I truly loved it even though I’m still freaking out and the fall seems so very far away. I wanna know what happens next NOW.

I was also absolutely certain Naomi would die in the finale – I refused to accept that she would live to go to season 9. I said before that I didn’t even care who killed her or how she died so long as she did and yet again, Supernatural went and changed things on me.

Naomi had to go and apologize and act reasonable and warn them about the danger they were in. THEN they kill her. After she reveals herself to not be a total bitch, they have Metatron shove a drill in her skull.

Not only that, but I trusted Metatron, damn it. I was a bit wary, but I never thought I had anything to actually worry about. I should have listened to my own advice. I always say that you should never trust or like any new character on the show because they always, always turn evil and/or die. ALWAYS.

Supernatural is why I have trust issues.

The story line of this season was just brilliant. The episodes were brilliant. Everything was just brilliant. There was only one not-quite-brilliant-but-still-good episode this season and the only reason I didn’t love that episode was because it’s a crime to have an SPN episode with so little Sam and Dean.

I’m not exaggerating when I say I think this season is the best one yet. The acting, the stories, the cast, the directing, everything was brilliant. It was emotional, it was visceral, it was beautiful and painful and terrifically wonderful.

I only have one concern and that is this: Crowley. They did not finish curing Crowley. Does this mean he will go back to being his demonic self or did the purified blood change him too much? If he does go back to be a demon, will he escape or will Sam and Dean kill him before he can? He’s still chained up in the church. Does he get away? Did they just leave him in there? I’m very, very concerned about the Crowley storyline. I don’t want Crowley to go away just yet.

Also, I’m very interested to see if Abaddon comes back. She smoked out of the body she was in so it’s entirely possible.
And I am extremely anxious to see how they fix the fallen angel problem. (Did anyone else thing it was really beautiful in a depressing way watching all the angels fall?) How are they going to fix thousands of angels thrown out of Heaven? How are they going to solve this one? Are they going to kill Metatron?

I can’t wait to see Sam and Dean and Cas reunited again, working to fix this. I am dying for season 9 already.

Seriously. Why isn’t it Fall yet?

As we prepare for tonight’s episode (Sacrifice, 8×23) of Supernatural I figured I might as well say a few things about my expectations for the episode before I get my heart ripped out and am unable to do anything but choke on my own tears. Besides, maybe if I talk my way through it before the episode, I won’t be catatonic by the end of it…

So, here are a few of my thoughts on what I expect to happen and what I want to happen tonight:

Curing Crowley:

I cannot stress enough how much I do not want this to happen. Crowley having his humanity restored would be even worse than killing him outright. You take away the badass, ruthless demon and Crowley won’t be half as awesome as he is. I couldn’t take that. I’d rather he just be killed. My hope is that Sam and Dean won’t be able to curse him because Abaddon will burst in before they can. (That’s what I think will happen from the promo at least).

I’d much rather Abaddon kill Crowley than Sam and Dean cure him. I mean, I don’t want him to die, but if it’s a choice between the two then you can bet your ass I’d rather see him dead.

Sealing off Hell:

Again, this is something I am vehemently against. I just don’t want them to be successful here. It’s not like I’m rooting for the bad guys (though, with the generally awesome cast of baddies on SPN, that’s not necessarily a bad thing…), but I just can’t figure out how they’d even have a show anymore with Hell sealed off.

It would mean the end of Crowley, which is enough for me to hate it. But it would also effectively destroy any chance of most of the major villains from the series ever coming back or for them to have anywhere near the same level of badassery.

Let’s face it, the demons are their best villains. The Leviathan just pissed me off and while the angels were total dickbags, only Lucifer really lived up to the same level of awesome as their demon villains.

Meg, Azazel, Abaddon, Crowley… They’re the kind of bad guys that this show needs and closing the Gates of Hell would destroy their cast of villains. We’d be stuck with fucking Naomi and no one wants that. No one.

So I want Sam and Dean to lose this one, for the sake of the show. They cannot win. If they do close the Gates of Hell, I expect there to be severe backlash. Like, opening the Cage and freeing Lucifer backlash.

Sealing off Heaven:

This, however, I’m not so against. I will admit, I’m very nervous about these trials Cas is going to have to do. And a friend pointed out that Metatron could very well be hiding something. And given that he’s an angel, there’s likely some unknown agenda there. But still, I really love the idea of slamming the Pearly Gates shut. Plus, the way Metatron talked, it seems like a non-permanent solution so the Gates could be opened again.

It seems like a sound solution for getting thing in Heaven back in order. They need it. Things have been insanely chaotic up there since season 5. And they seem to be getting worse. It’s a sad, sad day when Hell is more organized than Heaven.

Killing Naomi:

Okay… I want this so bad. I just really want Naomi to die. I don’t even care who kills her, I just want to see her dead. I’d prefer for Cas to do it, but I honestly don’t care if it’s Crowley or Dean or Sam… Hell, it could be some nameless angel or demon. I don’t give a fuck, just stab the bitch in the face and put us out of our misery.

The “Sacrifice”:

I’ve already talked a bit about my thoughts on the episode title and what it could mean. I think I’d love for the sacrifice in question to be Sam giving his life up – I’d never, ever forgive them, however, if it’s Dean again. Dean died last season, don’t kill him again.

Besides, the state Sam’s in… he’s not gonna live through this one, I don’t think. It horrifies me, because as you should know I’m a total SamGirl, but it’s not like he’ll be dead permanently. So I’d be okay with it.

I wouldn’t be okay with Cas dying again. I want them to cut Cas a break. Oddly enough, I never want them to cut Sam and Dean a break, but with Cas… damn it, stop picking on him! He’s been through enough. Poor, nerdy little badass warrior of God.

My random, totally-not-gonna-happen-but-dear-Lucifer-if-it-did-theory: The “sacrifice” is Amelia. Sam has to kill Amelia. And he does. Sure, it’ll scar him psychologically, but he spent nearly 200 years in Hell and seems relatively fine now. He’ll get over it. Just kill Amelia and I won’t complain about anything else that happens.

Dean and Cas:

It’s not what you think, I swear. While I totally ship Destiel, I seriously doubt it’ll happen outside of fanfiction and fanvids. No, what I’m talking about is how Dean was a total dick last Wednesday for no reason and Cas clearly was trying to make it up to Dean so what I want, more than anything, from tonight’s finale is for Dean to forgive Cas. And hug him.

I want a Dean/Cas hug, damn it. Cas deserves to be forgiving. I wouldn’t blame Cas if he punched Dean in the face for being such an ass to him.

And, if we can’t get Dean and Cas hugging, can Sam hug him? Please? Because Sam hasn’t hugged Cas and Cas needs a hug, damn it! Someone just hug Cas!

Crowley’s Victims:

So… I’ve been thinking about this. Crowley read Chuck’s books. (And apparently, Chuck has been publishing them again since Crowley knew about Jenny – who was from season 7 – and Charlie knew Sam and Dean saved the world – something they didn’t do until season 5.) And Crowley’s been using the books to find victims…

I know it’s unlikely, if not impossible, but this is just a short list of who I think he should have gone/should go after:

Cassie – Dean’s ex from the racist truck episode, “Route 666

Lucas – the little boy they saved in “Dead in the Water

Michael and/or Asher – the two little boys they saved in “Something Wicked

Tyler – the little girl from “Playthings

Tara – the actress from “Hollywood Babylon

Matt – the kid from “Bugs” (yes, I realize the same actor played Samandriel… but still, it could work!)

Lori – the girl from “Hook Man

Yes, I am aware that there are several children on this list. But if Crowley’s going all out, he might as well. Plus, the kids would be older now. Also, I tried to include more people that Sam connected with… but they all seem to be dead so really, Matt and Lori are all I can think off. Anyway.

I think that’s pretty much everything. I still don’t feel an less anxious about the finale, but hey, maybe I won’t drown on my own tears tonight.

*bursts out laughing*

Yeah right. I’m screwed. Oh well. Time to go prepare my emo corner for when the episode is over. I’ve got a lot of sobbing ahead of me, I think.