Posts Tagged ‘Awesome TV’

Sorry I wasn’t able to post after the episode aired last night. My home internet is wonky at the best of times and the laptop I’m currently using sucks. Still, I did want to do a post on the episode since it’s the season opener and is meant to set the tone for the entire season and so here it is, a bit late, but ah well.

To start off, I loved the episode. I mean, I cried a lot and I yelled a lot, but that’s par for course with Supernatural so I’m not complaining and I think everyone did a phenominal job with the episode and I am so excited for this season and where it’s going!

Now, on to my thoughts…

Sam:

God. Sam made me sob this episode. I mean, pretty much everyone did, but I mean… just Sam. I can’t even begin to tell you how my heart started breaking when Bobby showed up in the Impala and him and Dean started arguing about whether or not Sam should just give up and Sam kept leaning toward giving up.

That scene with Death where Sam wants to make sure he can never be brought back hit me hard, especially. I mean, Sam and Dean have been through Hell and back (literally) and I know that wears on them and it’s enough to break anyone, but when he said that, when he basically just decided “This is it. I can’t go on. No more fighting, just let me be dead,” well, part of me broke.

I actually go a little angry at Dean for not letting him rest, because much as I love them and the show and Dean’s devotion to Sam, the fact is that Sam was ready to let go and Dean just refused to accept it (which is heartbreaking in itself) and I can’t figure out if he was wrong to try so hard to help Sam or not.

Dean:

Where to begin? With that horrible, angst ridden prayer? With the desperation eking out of his every action? With him going to Crowley to maybe make a deal to fix Sam?

With him killing Bobby in Sam’s head (though, I am aware that technically that Dean was part of Sam – he was pretty much Dean so, yeah)? Or maybe with him letting Ezekiel possess Sam to fix him under false pretenses, basically tricking Sam into it? God, Dean must’ve been pretty damn desperate to do that and it still kind of pissed me off.

I know he doesn’t want Sam to die and I know he loves Sam and I know he couldn’t bear to lose his brother and he’s just doing what he thinks is best, but God, Dean, could you pick a more awful way to do it? I mean, I want to trust Ezekiel and he seems freaking awesome thus far, but still. This is Sam’s life and Sam’s body and Sam’s mind and Dean’s going around making these choices.

He sort of gave Sam a choice, but he knew it wasn’t really a choice. I don’t want to sound like I’m bitching here, because I’m really not, it’s just that I can already bet there is going to be major fireworks over this later because when Sam figures out what happened… Dean is in deep shit.

But Dean still broke my heart and was so badass and so, well, Dean. I can’t help but want to hug him and say it’s okay and everything will be alright, even if it won’t.

Castiel:

*clears throat*

HE TOOK OFF THE TRENCH COAT! HE *TOOK OFF* THE FUCKING TRENCHING COAT!

Ahem.

I knew that was coming and it still managed to upset me more than nearly everything else this entire episode.

I gotta say, Cas’s determination to do the right thing and help the angels and fix this mess, it’s just so very him. I love that it actually took him a while to piece together the things that are going to be different for him now that he’s human and has all the problems that go along with that.

Particularly that scene where he first realizes he’s hurt. That made me teary. Poor Cas. He’s been run through the ringer so many times, always for trying to do the right thing, and now most of the angels hate him even more and are trying to kill him.

And even as lost and broken as he was, Cas still managed to be totally badass and prove that despite being human, he’s still a warrior and fucking with him is a bad idea. I am so excited for the Cas story arc this season (minus the love interest, which I remain dubious about until I see if they pulled it off..)

Bobby:

You have no idea how I squeed when Bobby showed up. I was so excited and I almost jumped off my bed. I was so glad to see him again and so glad that he showed up in Sam’s mind to try and talk him into being rational and doing what needs to be done.

Though it does strike me as odd that Bobby was the one telling Sam to move on and let go when Bobby seems to have a lot of trouble with that – he sure as hell didn’t want to let go any of the times he was supposed to. But I suppose he did learn (after the trouble that happened with him as a ghost) that letting go is kind of really important… I was just thrilled to have him back.

(And, again, I almost screamed when Dean killed him…)

And finally…

Ezekiel:

How totally awesome was Ezekiel guys? Oh my god, I think I’m in love with another angel. And that’s something I don’t say often seeing how I hate all but like, three of them.

Tahmoh Penikett was amazing. Seriously amazing. I’m not kidding, guys. I loved Ezekiel so much and I wanna rewatch the episode just for him.

HOWEVER, I am so, so wary to trust this character. I want to, I really, really do, but SPN has a history of introducing character and then them turning out to be totally evil and so I’m really not sure. He’s an angel and he’s now possessing Sam. That could be disastorous if he isn’t trustworthy. That could be terrible.

So I want to trust him, but i’m scared to because what if I get my heart ripped out AGAIN?

ezekiel

 

But anyway, that’s just some of my thoughts on the episode. I’m so excited for the rest of this season to see how everything pans out!

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Get excited everyone! Supernatural‘s ninth season starts tonight at nine! (At least here in the US – I’m not sure about airing times outside the country). The first episode is titled, “I Think I’m Gonna Like It Here” and I am so excited I can hardly wait. Lucky me I’ve got some essays to write to distract me and give me things to do.

If I had a more reliable internet connection (and my personal laptop wasn’t out of commission) I’d promise a post later tonight (midnight my time so that everyone should get a chance to see the episode) about my thoughts – nothing long or fancy, of course, just a few words on my reaction. However, I’m honestly not sure if I’ll be able to and my thoughts might have to wait ’til Thursday. I will try though.

I’m just so glad to finally get back to Sam and Dean. (And Cas!) I’ve been watching season 8 on my DVDs and the special features and commentaries and it is just not enough. Pretty much every fandom I’m a part of (except Doctor Who and Sherlock and Hannibal) have already started their new seasons – I’ve just been waiting (im)patiently for SPN to get back so I can find out what the heck is happening.

But now all that waiting is (nearly) over and we’re just a few hours away from the premier episode!

To get you guys pumped, here’s a clip from tonight’s episode!

I’ve been discussing this quite a lot with friends recently. Mostly because I enjoy talking about the villains of my favorite fandoms (I dunno who I love more… Loki, the Joker, the Master or Lucifer… Or Hannibal. Can I have them all?). A common idea that keeps popping up, however is that Supernatural’s most infamous and evil villain is God.

Disclaimer: Please note that I am speaking ONLY of the character of God in the television series “Supernatural” and not any actual religious deity. This post in no way reflects my opinions on religion, Christianity, or God.

Let me break it down a little bit (though I’m sure some of you can already see what I’m saying):

The biggest villains in Supernatural were as follows: demons and angels.

Demons only exist because Lucifer rebelled. Lucifer rebelled because God expected him to bow to humanity, which is clearly flawed logical because angels are über awesome.

Azazel killed Samuel and Diana Campbell to get Mary to make a deal for her son. He needed her to make that deal so he could infect Sam with his demon blood and get Sam to open Lucifer’s cage twenty some-odd years later. (It was a very thorough and LONG master plan, after all.)

Lucifer broke out of his Cage because who wants to be stuck in a Cage for eternity? Lucifer used Sam to free himself because it was all part of the Plan. It was all part of the Plan because God said so.

Michael brought Adam back from the dead and used him as bait to get Dean to say yes. Dean’s a stubborn ass and Adam gets the short end of the deal. Why did Michael even WANT Dean as his vessel? BECAUSE GOD SAID SO.

God knew all along that Lucifer would rebel and what it would all lead to… yet did nothing to prevent it and let Lucifer turn Lilith into a demon, thereby cementing his fate and the fate of every other living thing. God forced Michael to cast his own brother (someone Michael clearly cared about) into Hell because of this disobedience rather than KILLING LUCIFER LIKE HE TOTALLY COULD HAVE.

God then promptly ditched the angels, leaving them to their own devices. When Sam and Dean went to him, asking for help stopping Lucifer he said it wasn’t his problem. Yet he CREATED the problem. He had enough forethought to CREATE the plan to fix it, though that plan ensured that Sam and Dean and their family never be happy or have normal, healthy lives.

When Dean was in Hell, God could have gotten him out before he broke. He’s God. He can do anything. He could’ve saved Dean. When Sam was in Hell, God could’ve gotten him out – with his soul. Again, he’s God. He can do that. Hell, when Ruby was manipulating Sam, God could’ve intervened and killed her. He could’ve stopped Lilith. He could’ve killed Lucifer. He could’ve returned to Heaven and straightened his CHILDREN up, putting an end to their “Let’s burn the entire earth” nonsense.

Really, aside from getting Sam and Dean out of that church (and repeatedly forcing Castiel to die and return to life, each time worse than the last for the poor angel) WHAT has God done to assist in cleaning up the utter mess he STARTED.

He made Lucifer. Lucifer rebelled and created demons. God created Hell and made Michael cast Lucifer into it. Lucifer got pissed, decided to destroy all of humanity to show God how wrong he was. Michael got bitter because his brother was stubborn and wouldn’t realized that “daddy knows best”. Gabriel hightailed because his family sucks. God ran away because I guess the pressure of totally being the biggest asshole ever just get to you or something.

 God not only created the problem and did very little to correct it (even though, if he had truly wanted to, he COULD HAVE), he actively avoided fixing the problem and instead decided to use two humans – thereby destroying THEIR lives as well as ruining the angels’ existence – to end the world and/or possibly save everyone.

I highly doubt Lucifer, Azazel or any of the angels or demons would’ve gone after Sam and Dean if they hadn’t KNOWN that it was all supposed to end with them on opposite sides of the final showdown between Heaven and Hell.

The argument could be made that God helped them (as the heavy implication that Chuck is God would suggest) to avoid ending the world, but he didn’t exactly do much considering he’s an all-powerful God, now did he? He could destroy everything and everyone with a thought. He could have stopped Lucifer, he could’ve stopped Michael, he could’ve stopped Raphael.

Hell, in season 6 Castiel prays for guidance on the Purgatory issue and God could’ve at the very least shown him something to let him know how dangerous and wrong the path he was on was at that time, but he didn’t. He did absolutely nothing.

And I’m not particularly fond of the “but he gave them freewill” argument either. God’s actions cannot be justified in the show with that simple statement. He had the opportunity to help, he was asked for guidance and gave none, he abandoned his children and humanity, he ruined the Winchesters’ lives and he knew it was going to happen exactly that way.

So yeah, God’s the biggest asshole in SPN.

Oh wow, look at that! I’m not dead. I’m really sorry for the extreme gap between posts. I haven’t been able to actually get on WordPress outside of a mobile device lately because my personal laptop is on the fritz. *sigh* That, and life is hectic. I just started a new semester (only one more to go!) and I’ve been writing (both fanfics and original work) and reading a LOT. Not to mention I started sporking City of Fallen Angels by Cassandra Clare last month on my FB and slogging through Jace’s bullshit is actually becoming painful.

But anyway. I actually have access to a computer (in campus computer lab) and I’m going to actually give you guys a post for a change! I know, I know. Shocking.

So today’s topic of discussion: Dean’s sexuality.

For the record, I personally believe that Dean Winchester is bisexual. Please note that I do not believe this simply because I’m an avid slash fan or a very proud Destiel shipper. I love Dean and Cas as friends and frankly, though I enjoy entertaining the thought that they’d have sexually romantic relationship, I’m not going to delude myself into thinking either of them would actually do that. That doesn’t change my thoughts on Dean’s sexuality, however. And I’m going to tell you why.

Many people who don’t believe that Dean is gay or bisexual cite Dean’s womanizing ways as proof of his heterosexuality. I’m going to use it for my own argument though.

Dean was raised in a very masculine environment, trained to do the things “real men” should do. John was a very strict military man and while he wasn’t in the marine corps. when Dean was growing up, he still held those ideals and convictions. I doubt Dean would ever feel comfortable admitting to himself, let alone his father, that he found men attractive. And so of course he would try to compensate for that, telling himself that of course he isn’t gay because he clearly likes women. It became a way for Dean to push down those others thoughts and feelings.

If you’ve noticed, in the earlier seasons Dean was very self-conscious and a lot of his self-worth was tied into what his father thought of him. He wouldn’t want to do anything to jeopardize his image in John’s eyes. He flirted with women, he had lots of random, casual sex with women and rarely had any fulfilling, committed relationships with women.

Dean hated himself. Let’s not argue about that, because it’s canon. He truly felt unworthy, unwanted or downright useless at times and there was a point where he believed he deserved to go to Hell. Questioning his sexuality, among the angst of trying to find himself outside of his father’s ideas, certainly would have added to that.

And since Dean’s return from Hell he’s expressed more romantic inclinations – like his relationship with Lisa. I personally think that Dean wanted that relationship to work more than anything. He put effort into it like he never really had in a romantic relationship and was content for a while, until it fell apart.

As the seasons have gone by and Dean’s learned to accept himself – though, clearly he still has some issues with his self-worth – he’s become more open. In the early years when someone suggested he was gay, Dean would make a smartass retort, turn it into a joke or balk at it disbelieving and wonder how they could think such a thing.

Now, as we saw in “Everybody Hates Hitler”, he is more awkward and sort of dorky as he tries to work his way through the situation of being flirted with by another man. He doesn’t make flippant remarks, immediately deny the accuse of him being gay. Instead, he acts very much like he does when he is flirting seriously. The way he acted with Aaron was very reminiscent of the way he acted around Cassie (season 1, “Route 666”) and Lisa throughout the early episodes of their relationship (mostly in season 3).

It feels very much like Dean is gradually beginning to come into himself. He has stopped seeing himself in terms of what his father (or Sam or Bobby or anyone else) would see him and has started to see himself just as who he is and who he wants to be. He’s happier with himself than he’s ever been – in spite of his belief that he is merely a “grunt”, he seems to have a healthier opinion of himself as a whole.

I could be reading more into this than is really there, but I truly hope that they continue to explore this side of Dean and his newfound confidence in himself. Even if it doesn’t lead to him coming to terms with his sexuality they way I believe he should, I do hope they’ll at least explore Dean’s self-worth and growing confidence in the coming season. It would certainly be an interesting arc.

We haven’t really gone too deep into Dean’s own personal feels in the last couple of seasons and nothing much about his self-worth (at least not at any great length) since season 3. I’d like for them to do that in season nine. Actually, I’d like to see more of that for Sam, Dean and Cas. Season eight did a wonderful job of setting up some very intriguing arcs for all of the characters and I hope that they don’t drop the ball on exploring them once season nine gets here.

I have officially survived more than a week after the Supernatural finale. I find that to be a miracle considering that last Saturday I watched the Doctor Who finale and Thursday was the Elementary finale and this Wednesday was the Criminal Minds finale that SPOILER ALERT killed off a character they were just starting to develop properly. Those bastards.

But anyway, what I want to talk about today is the fact that I’ve been having these really aggravating arguments with people and was recently called a hypocrite BY MY OWN MOTHER for the way I act about Supernatural.

Basically, the gist of the story is: I despise Twilight with the white-hot intensity of a thousand suns. And I am vocal about that hatred. Then, someone said that they thought the recent season of Supernatural was stupid and the storyline was idiotic. I flipped my shit, guys, I will not lie. It utterly pissed me off. I didn’t flip out on the person who said it, but I did rant about it for a while to my brother and my mom overheard and told me I was getting upset for someone doing the same thing that I do to Twilight.

That made me stop and think because I never, EVER want to be compared to the crazy Twilight fangirls that scare the shit out of me.

Look, to be clear, everyone can have their own opinion and I get that there are people who just don’t like Supernatural. I can even accept that there are people who legitimately like Twilight. If everyone had the same opinions the world would be boring.

However, I do have to defend myself a bit: yes, I am a totally insane fangirl and yes, if you insult the fandoms I am a part of I will be very quick to argue my points. But the thing is, I LIKE arguing with people about that stuff. Not screaming, yelling, tossing insults, etc. of course. Just a good debate.

The difference between me and the fangirls I don’t like is that I won’t tell someone that they’re an idiot simply because they say that they don’t like something I happen to adore.

In the case of Supernatural, there are many fans who don’t like to hear negative things said about the show, but I’m not one of them. Hell, I think I rant enough about the show that some people probably have to wonder why I’m so in love with. There are things about the show that I despise with such intensity that thinking about them upsets me.

I can go on for hours about the shitty things I hate Dean for doing, about the stupid choices Sam has made and about how much John Winchester pissed me off. Yet, I love them all.

I’m not one of those fangirls who thinks my fandom is above reproach. I don’t think Supernatural is perfect. What I do think, however, is that it is brilliant. I think the show is a lot deeper than some people think. I think the storyline (especially this season) is unique and beautiful. I think the relationship between Sam and Dean is amazing. I think Supernatural has some of the best actors ever on their show. I think the special effects are phenomenal. (And have improved dramatically since season 1.) I think the beauty of the show is that despite its flaws, it’s still remarkable and tells a story people are interested in. A story that I am very much in love with, with characters I care about.

I want people to stop assuming that being part of a fandom means that fangirls are the devotedly insane type of people who will bite your hand off for insulting their favorite character.

Seriously, go ahead and tell me how much you hate Sam Winchester. I have a very close friend who actually despises Sam to the point that she will write fanfictions with him being tortured just because. She’s a bit twisted, mind you, but it doesn’t bother me. In fact, we have some interesting debates about the show and other fandoms because we actually don’t agree on much of anything except that we love the shows.

I enjoy those kind of debates, talking about the nature of characters and what their choices mean and whether or not they were a “bad” character. It’s interesting and I learn things doing that.

Basically, what I’m saying is: I might be overly protective of my fandoms, I might get upset when someone goes to a site dedicated to loving the show and says it’s stupid, but if you’ve got actual reasons backing you up and aren’t just an idiotic troll, then I completely and utterly do not care that you have a differing opinion.

No one can convince me that Supernatural isn’t awesome, but then again, I doubt I could convince someone that it IS awesome if they’re so deadest on hating it so there’s that.

I think I’m done now… I need to go prepare myself for watching the re-run of “As Time Goes By” tonight. Because I’m a masochist and I wanna rip open the scars.

Now that I’ve had some time to recover I think it’s time to take a look back at season 8… (Note that when I say “recover” I mostly just mean I ran out of tears. I’m still reeling from the finale)

I can say honestly that season 8 is my new favorite season. I admit, there are aspects of it that I am still not happy with (like, say, Amelia) but all the same, it was a brilliant, heartbreaking, turbulent rollercoaster ride of awesomeness and badassery like we haven’t really seen in a while.

I have never not loved Supernatural, but I will admit that season 6 was a bit of a mess story-wise and season 7 (while wonderful) had more than its share of moments that made me wanna punch things. (Of course, if we’re looking at all the seasons, nothing in the show is worse than season 3…)

Anyway, this season really took the show somewhere new and also brought back some of the old spark that was the reason I fell in love with it in the first place.

Specifically, I’m talking about Sam and Dean and their relationship.

I don’t know if anyone noticed, but after season 5, Sam and Dean didn’t seem as close. Not that they didn’t care about each other, but there were less brother moments, there was more tension and fighting and very little of the brotherly banter in the first few seasons.

But this season really delivered on the Brotherly Love scale. We got to see Sam and Dean like they haven’t been in a long time. Sure, they were fighting (especially in the beginning when Dean was angry at Sam for not looking for him in Purgatory) but they still looked out for each other and their love for each other really became the focus of the season like it hasn’t been in far too long.

Sam’s struggle with the trials, Dean’s struggle to be there for him even when he couldn’t really do anything about what was going on really reminded me a lot of season 2, when they were freaked out about what was happening to Sam because of the YED.

And the finale… Oh god, the scene where Sam tells Dean about his biggest sin. You guys, I was crying buckets. It was so heartbreaking and so beautiful and it really was just so perfect. I was so happy they had that scene because they needed that scene. The last couple of seasons didn’t give us those kinds of scenes like they used to.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: Supernatural never fails to surprise me. Just when I think I have things figured out, they change the rules on me.

I was sure that the trials would kill Sam. I was sure of it like I haven’t been sure of anything in a long time. And the worst part is, I was right, but Sam still didn’t die. I totally expected Sam to die in the finale and I have to say and I was pleasantly surprised that not one of the main characters died. We still have Sam, Dean AND Cas.

I said I wanted them to do something different for the finale this year and they did. And I truly loved it even though I’m still freaking out and the fall seems so very far away. I wanna know what happens next NOW.

I was also absolutely certain Naomi would die in the finale – I refused to accept that she would live to go to season 9. I said before that I didn’t even care who killed her or how she died so long as she did and yet again, Supernatural went and changed things on me.

Naomi had to go and apologize and act reasonable and warn them about the danger they were in. THEN they kill her. After she reveals herself to not be a total bitch, they have Metatron shove a drill in her skull.

Not only that, but I trusted Metatron, damn it. I was a bit wary, but I never thought I had anything to actually worry about. I should have listened to my own advice. I always say that you should never trust or like any new character on the show because they always, always turn evil and/or die. ALWAYS.

Supernatural is why I have trust issues.

The story line of this season was just brilliant. The episodes were brilliant. Everything was just brilliant. There was only one not-quite-brilliant-but-still-good episode this season and the only reason I didn’t love that episode was because it’s a crime to have an SPN episode with so little Sam and Dean.

I’m not exaggerating when I say I think this season is the best one yet. The acting, the stories, the cast, the directing, everything was brilliant. It was emotional, it was visceral, it was beautiful and painful and terrifically wonderful.

I only have one concern and that is this: Crowley. They did not finish curing Crowley. Does this mean he will go back to being his demonic self or did the purified blood change him too much? If he does go back to be a demon, will he escape or will Sam and Dean kill him before he can? He’s still chained up in the church. Does he get away? Did they just leave him in there? I’m very, very concerned about the Crowley storyline. I don’t want Crowley to go away just yet.

Also, I’m very interested to see if Abaddon comes back. She smoked out of the body she was in so it’s entirely possible.
And I am extremely anxious to see how they fix the fallen angel problem. (Did anyone else thing it was really beautiful in a depressing way watching all the angels fall?) How are they going to fix thousands of angels thrown out of Heaven? How are they going to solve this one? Are they going to kill Metatron?

I can’t wait to see Sam and Dean and Cas reunited again, working to fix this. I am dying for season 9 already.

Seriously. Why isn’t it Fall yet?

So, I’ve been thinking an awful lot about this season lately and since most of today has been taken up with Doctor Who (Moffat, you seriously are ruining my emotions) and I’ve been dwelling too much on huge schemes and plans only sadistic writers can possibly come up with… My brain has gotten a bit derailed.

But last week’s episode, “Freaks and Geeks”, was surprisingly not traumatizing (my friend says that’s because they’re trying to lull us into a false sense of security) and that promo made me literally jump off the couch and gape at the TV… I just can’t stop thinking about where this season is going.

Now, I’m not predicting anything, mostly because I hate to try and predict what’s gonna happen – what if I’m right and I totally spoiled it? Or if I’m wrong and disappointed? – I’m not the best at self-restraint and let me tell you, I’ve gone over dozens of ways that Supernatural will end (for good, that is).

But for now, I’m just gonna focus on this particular season.

It has been brought to my attention that the finale is to be titled “Sacrifice”. What with the trials for closing Hell going on right now, that does not make me optimistic. At worst, it means that either Sam or Dean is going to die again (I simply refuse to accept Castiel’s death being the ‘sacrifice’ in question) and at best… at best they’re talking about a sacrifice that has nothing to do with death.

Since this is Supernatural, that’s almost an impossibility.

Now, I’ve never been one to just give up on a TV show. To date, the ONLY show I was once obsessed with and stopped watching is CSI and I gave the show a running chance before finally losing interest. However, I have to say that I’ll probably be upset if season 8 ends with Sam or Dean dying again – especially if it’s Dean.

Hear me out, this isn’t because I don’t like them dying. I mean, I don’t, but I know they’ll come back so that’s not the issue. The issue is that it’s been done as the finale SO MANY TIMES. Season 3 – Dean’s dragged to Hell. Season 4 – Cas is exploded by Raphael.Season 5 – Sam jumps in the Cage. Season 6 – Castiel absorbs the Leviathans. Season 7 – Dean and Cas are sucked into Purgatory.

If Dean dies at the end of this season, I will be pissed. Because he died last season and the guy deserves a freakin’ break, okay? If Sam dies, I may be more lenient (strange, coming from a SamGirl) but that depends on exactly why and how his death happens. Honestly, the whole “Let’s end the season with Sam or Dean dead” thing is a bit done, ya know? I want to see something different this season. And that doesn’t mean I want Cas to die, because I swear, if THAT happens, I’ll put a fist through my TV screen.

Now, as far as closing the Gates of Hell goes… It might sound awful, but I want them to lose. I do not want them to be able to close the Gates of Hell, I do not ever want the Gates of Hell sealed off. They lose so many potential bad guys and it would also mean the loss of Crowley and the impossibility of Lucifer ever coming back and also, it would mean Adam is permanently trapped down there. I can’t accept those ideas as fact. I refuse.

Since they discovered the tablet and Kevin told them about the possibility of sealing Hell, my friend Beth has been adamant that it’s all a trap that’ll actually open the Cage. I’d love for that to happen because, holy Hell, imagine the awesomeness that would ensue. Of course, I’m doubtful of that being the case, but a girl can dream, right?

I mean, even if they can close Hell off, I want there to be serious repercussions. This cannot come without a heavy price and, as I said, I’m not overly fond of the price being Sam or Dean’s life… Or Cas’.

I flipped around the possibility of the “Sacrifice” in question being that Sam (because he’s the one doing the trials) having to literally sacrifice someone he loves. If that’s true (shit, think of how awesome yet awful that’d be) Dean would be the best candidate, but I think I’d love for it to be Amelia if that were the case. (And yeah, that’s probably because if my intense hatred of that annoying totally-not-a-fucking-unicorn Mary-Sue.)

Anyway, just a little bit of my own musings about this year’s finale… I’m excited for it, but dreading it as anyone should dread a season finale of Supernatural. I really hope they don’t end with Sam or Dean dying, but I’m sure as Hell not gonna say that if it happens I’ll never watch the show again. Supernatural always finds new ways of surprising me and I’m sure this finale will be no different.

So, last night/tonight’s SPN episode was amazing and we got to learn more about witches, which was very cool. Since I’m sick, but my medicine hasn’t allowed me to sleep yet, I decided to post a few thoughts on the episode here…

Maybe it’s because I just started reading the 2nd Dresden Files book, but I totally kept expecting Harry Dresden to show up, he would’ve fit perfectly into tonight’s episode. I mean, the SPN witches are very close to the Dresden Files witches and Harry being a Wizard and PI, it would make perfect sense for me him to show up. But that’s just my newest addiction bleeding through. Probably.

But in all seriousness, Harry would’ve been helpful and maybe it’s also my strange obsession with crossovers, but I can see it all so perfectly in my head. Come on, tell me it doesn’t make absolutely perfect sense. Anyway.

I loved getting to see into the witch community. We’ve never gotten to do that before and it was very interesting and I loved Portia and her interaction with Sam and Dean… Ah, Dean was so cute when he said “I like dogs,” and I was just shaking my head. Oh Dean. Don’t you ever change. (As a side note, I’m actually pretty damn proud of Dean for not once saying the word “bestiality” in the whole episode…)

I was actually shedding HAPPY tears at the end of this episode. Which, for SPN, is remarkable in and of itself. That’s hardly ever (if ever…) happened. But Dean calling Sam “Sammy” gets me every time and he’s done it a couple of times this season and it makes my heart swell and I just… Aw…

Also, going off on a bit of tangent, but… Sam’s confrontation with Dean about Dean not being able to trust anyone but himself… Okay, first, yeah, Sam’s probably right about that (though I think Dean wanting to protect Sam is a big motivational factor…) but I just was like… “Wait, I… I’m the exact same way. Are you… are you telling me wanting to do something yourself because you don’t trust anyone else to do it right is BAD? Shit…” Seriously. I end up doing shit I don’t want to do, simply because I don’t think anyone else can do it the way it’s supposed to be done. Is that really a bad thing?? I suppose maybe it is. Damn it. Anyway, moving on.

After Dean was all, “I DO trust you,” and everything, I was smiling and my eyes were watering from happy tears… Then Sam started coughing. At first, I was like “Oh look, Sam’s got the same damn flu I do…” Then blood came out of his mouth. And I was like “Shit. What the hell is that?” For half a second, I thought he was gonna say something to Dean, then he just wiped the blood away and was all “I’m good,” and I just screamed “YOU FUCKING LIAR!!”

What the fuck, Sam? What… How long have you been hiding this? What’s going on? Why won’t you tell Dean? I’M SO CONFUSED. Dude, Sam, you JUST got of my “Winchesters I Wanna Punch in the Face” list LAST episode. Now, Dean’s the one off the hook and you’re BACK ON IT. You couldn’t even go a couple of episodes without getting back on my list, could you? DAMN IT. I hate Winchesters. I just hate them. Except Adam. ‘Cos he certainly doesn’t deserve my hate.

That whole “coughing up blood” thing came out of freaking NOWHERE. There were no warning signs, no hints earlier in the episode that something was going on with Sam. Nothing to indicate that we should be suspicious or worry about him and then BAM. Sam’s coughing blood and NOT SAYING A DAMN THING ABOUT IT. What. The. Fuck?

I can’t even wrap my head around this. Is this a result of the “Trials” thing? Has this been happening and he just hasn’t said anything? Is he sick? Is he dying? Did someone put a spell on him? (Hah, actually, a friend came up with a hilarious crack!theory of Amelia being a witch and hexing him… Riot, the dog, was obviously Amelia’s familiar in this scenario… I love my friends.)

*sighs* I guess there really is no way for me to win with this damn show. Supernatural is determined to screw with my head until it explodes from the pressure of the constant mind fucks. Not to mention the emotional TORTURE that the show puts me through. Jeesh.

Remind me again why I watch this show? Oh, right. It’s awesome.

I should be institutionalized.

I was going on about the latest Supernatural episode to a friend (who does not watch the show) and halfway through my rather long-winded rant, she just stopped me and asked “Why do you care so much about these people? They aren’t real!”

(In case you’re wondering, she’s not a very GOOD friend…)

Anyway, it actually got me to thinking, because I do talk and talk and talk about these character and about how much it hurts when I see them hurt. Especially last Wednesday’s episode, with Dean giving his customary “I’m totally worthless,” speech again. Honestly, either I’m a masochist or I just have no soul because a sane person would not continue to put themselves in such a position to be hurt again and again.

After thinking (and thinking and thinking) I’ve decided that this show means quite a lot to me for many reasons. I am a fandom nerd, I admit it. I obsess over many fandoms, Supernatural is only one of them. However, it has become the one that I obsess over the most. It’s the one that hurts the most, the one that I get the most excited for and the one I spend the majority of my time annoying friends with.

The thing that attracted me to the show wasn’t the monsters and the fight scenes… It was the characters.

First it was Sam and Dean and their relationship with one another. Their bond, that Die-For-Each-Other love is what makes them so amazing. Those moments whenever I can watch them interacting and smiling and teasing each other…

There are those awful periods where Sam and Dean are fighting, and it just tears at my heart to see them at odds. I get the intense urge to grab then and throw them into a room, telling them they either hug and make up or they die. A lot of this season has had me screaming at my computer screen in anger because of their fighting. Thankfully, the latest episodes are bringing me hope and the direction that things are going is making me very, very happy.

Then there’s John Winchester. A lot of people seem to hate John and claim that he was a bad father, but John was always doing the very best that he could do and he loved no one more than his sons. He wasn’t the best father in the world, but the fact that he tried is what makes me love him so much. Many fathers don’t even do that.

The worst part is, I had always thought that John’s loyalty to family, him drilling that same loyalty and family responsibility into his children… I thought that was because his own father had taught him the same. Then we met Henry and I realized that it was just the opposite. John was so dedicated to his family, because he was striving to be the father he never had.

And it’s not just the Winchesters that have managed to wrap themselves up into my heart. From the moment he was introduced I was in love with Castiel and he only became a more and more compelling and relatable character as the show moved forward.

The thing about Cas that I love so much is the fact that I relate to him so well. I mean, I can find things that remind me of myself in the other characters, but with Cas his struggle with faith, both in himself and in God, was very similar to my own struggles with faith and religion. Something just… clicked with Cas. There isn’t a character on the show I’m more willing to forgive for any wrongdoing than Cas.

I’ve been angry with Sam and Dean for months at a time, but I can’t really ever seem to be too mad at Cas, even whenever he didn’t listen to Dean or when he nearly got them all killed… I just wanted to hug him and tell him it would be okay, but I couldn’t make myself be angry at him.

So… maybe it does sound a little strange to say that I get angry at fictional characters, or that I cry when they’re hurt, or that whenever things are looking up for them I smile, but these characters are so real that I cannot help it. I connect with them, I love them, I hate them and I want them to win and be happy. They’re very real to me. That’s why this show means so much to me. That’s why I care.

Character: Henry Winchester

First Appearance: S8E12, “As Time Goes By”

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I don’t think I should have to say it, but here it is: SPOILERS for Supernatural Season 8, Episode 12 “As Time Goes By”

There, now that you have been sufficiently warned… Let’s talk about Henry Winchester.

 

I knew I was going to love Henry based on the sheer fact that he was John’s father. I was thrilled to be learning more about John’s past, since all we’ve ever really heard is that he was a Marine who fought in Vietnam. I’ve always been curious about John’s family, since we know Mary’s family was all dead, I wondered if Sam and Dean knew about their dad’s family, and now we know.

It took five minutes, that was it. Five minutes and my heart melted for Henry Winchester. There is just something about Winchester men that makes them totally irresistible and wonderful on an epic scale.

I gotta say, the episode wasn’t what I expected. I heard they were doing time travel again (something I always love) and assumed angels must’ve been involved (angels, or the Doctor, but I didn’t get my hopes up there..) so whenever we started out in 1958 and it turns out that Henry is the one doing the traveling through time… Well, I was surprised.

I just have to ask though… is there just some rule that says the Winchesters can never be happy? That their lives just have to be awful? Really, I’m seriously. Let’s just take a look at all the Winchester men.

First, there’s John. He thought his father abandoned him when he was just a child, the woman he loved was brutally killed by a demon and he spent upwards of a hundred years in Hell being tortured. Now he’s God knows where, doing God knows what and he’ll never know what really happened to his father.

Then, we have Sam and Dean and I really don’t think I could ever accurately sum up the awfulness that is their lives.

And then Adam Milligan, the Winchester everyone forgets for some reason that pisses me off. Adam never did anything to deserve his fate, being trapped in Lucifer’s Cage with Michael and Lucifer, being two pissed off archangels’ punching bag for… lemme think… nearly 500 years now. The poor kid has to be mush at this point.

And now we have Henry, the man who travelled through time to stop a demon who killed his friends, who accidentally abandoned his son and never got the chance to know him and then who died because of the demon that fucked up his whole life.

Yeah, the Winchesters are cursed and the writers of Supernatural are doing this on purpose. They’re giving us these brilliant characters to fall in love with, just so they can take them from us.

Henry was such a brilliant character. I loved that he was a “Man of Letters” and the way he regarded hunters and his sheer horror at the fact that John had become a hunter, along with John’s kids… It was so sad and sweet.

I think my heart broke to pieces whenever Dean told Henry about what John’s life had been, and watching Henry read through John’s journal just about killed me, it was so… Oh, there just isn’t a word for it. When Henry realized he wasn’t going to make it back, that he wasn’t going to be able to raise his son… The tears were burning my eyes! It was so… heart-wrenching.

I didn’t expect Henry to die either… I knew he wasn’t going to make it back, of course. I’ve watched enough Doctor Who to know how time travel works. But I didn’t expect that sacrifice at the end. I gotta say, I was surprised at how calm Dean seemed… I get it, he hardly knew Henry and his last grandfather wasn’t exactly a great man.

Of course, I wasn’t surprised Henry would give his life for them… Winchesters just have that annoying habit of doing those self-sacrificing things. It’s why I love them, and hate them.

Henry was… is adorable the right word for it? For a grown man… Yeah, adorable seems like the right word. Funnily enough, I was reminded of Captain America. There was something very Steve Rogers-ish about Henry. I can’t quite put my finger on it, but my heart was his and I just spent most of the episode wanting to hug the guy and make it better.

Seeing Sam and Dean standing over his grave, Dean remarking about how their family tree was “a whole lot of dead” was just… heartbreaking. Honestly, the entire episode was heartbreaking and awful.

All I could think of was the fact that John will never know how much his father loved him, how much he wished he’d been there for him… The entire thing just had me in tears. These time travel episodes are never anything but angst and pain and a bunch of impossible situations that they just can’t fix.

It was only one episode, and my heart is aching for Henry and I already miss him. I’ve been crying since season two that I want John to come back, and now I’m crying that I want Henry back as well. This show will undoubtably be the death of me…