Oh wow, look at that! I’m not dead. I’m really sorry for the extreme gap between posts. I haven’t been able to actually get on WordPress outside of a mobile device lately because my personal laptop is on the fritz. *sigh* That, and life is hectic. I just started a new semester (only one more to go!) and I’ve been writing (both fanfics and original work) and reading a LOT. Not to mention I started sporking City of Fallen Angels by Cassandra Clare last month on my FB and slogging through Jace’s bullshit is actually becoming painful.

But anyway. I actually have access to a computer (in campus computer lab) and I’m going to actually give you guys a post for a change! I know, I know. Shocking.

So today’s topic of discussion: Dean’s sexuality.

For the record, I personally believe that Dean Winchester is bisexual. Please note that I do not believe this simply because I’m an avid slash fan or a very proud Destiel shipper. I love Dean and Cas as friends and frankly, though I enjoy entertaining the thought that they’d have sexually romantic relationship, I’m not going to delude myself into thinking either of them would actually do that. That doesn’t change my thoughts on Dean’s sexuality, however. And I’m going to tell you why.

Many people who don’t believe that Dean is gay or bisexual cite Dean’s womanizing ways as proof of his heterosexuality. I’m going to use it for my own argument though.

Dean was raised in a very masculine environment, trained to do the things “real men” should do. John was a very strict military man and while he wasn’t in the marine corps. when Dean was growing up, he still held those ideals and convictions. I doubt Dean would ever feel comfortable admitting to himself, let alone his father, that he found men attractive. And so of course he would try to compensate for that, telling himself that of course he isn’t gay because he clearly likes women. It became a way for Dean to push down those others thoughts and feelings.

If you’ve noticed, in the earlier seasons Dean was very self-conscious and a lot of his self-worth was tied into what his father thought of him. He wouldn’t want to do anything to jeopardize his image in John’s eyes. He flirted with women, he had lots of random, casual sex with women and rarely had any fulfilling, committed relationships with women.

Dean hated himself. Let’s not argue about that, because it’s canon. He truly felt unworthy, unwanted or downright useless at times and there was a point where he believed he deserved to go to Hell. Questioning his sexuality, among the angst of trying to find himself outside of his father’s ideas, certainly would have added to that.

And since Dean’s return from Hell he’s expressed more romantic inclinations – like his relationship with Lisa. I personally think that Dean wanted that relationship to work more than anything. He put effort into it like he never really had in a romantic relationship and was content for a while, until it fell apart.

As the seasons have gone by and Dean’s learned to accept himself – though, clearly he still has some issues with his self-worth – he’s become more open. In the early years when someone suggested he was gay, Dean would make a smartass retort, turn it into a joke or balk at it disbelieving and wonder how they could think such a thing.

Now, as we saw in “Everybody Hates Hitler”, he is more awkward and sort of dorky as he tries to work his way through the situation of being flirted with by another man. He doesn’t make flippant remarks, immediately deny the accuse of him being gay. Instead, he acts very much like he does when he is flirting seriously. The way he acted with Aaron was very reminiscent of the way he acted around Cassie (season 1, “Route 666”) and Lisa throughout the early episodes of their relationship (mostly in season 3).

It feels very much like Dean is gradually beginning to come into himself. He has stopped seeing himself in terms of what his father (or Sam or Bobby or anyone else) would see him and has started to see himself just as who he is and who he wants to be. He’s happier with himself than he’s ever been – in spite of his belief that he is merely a “grunt”, he seems to have a healthier opinion of himself as a whole.

I could be reading more into this than is really there, but I truly hope that they continue to explore this side of Dean and his newfound confidence in himself. Even if it doesn’t lead to him coming to terms with his sexuality they way I believe he should, I do hope they’ll at least explore Dean’s self-worth and growing confidence in the coming season. It would certainly be an interesting arc.

We haven’t really gone too deep into Dean’s own personal feels in the last couple of seasons and nothing much about his self-worth (at least not at any great length) since season 3. I’d like for them to do that in season nine. Actually, I’d like to see more of that for Sam, Dean and Cas. Season eight did a wonderful job of setting up some very intriguing arcs for all of the characters and I hope that they don’t drop the ball on exploring them once season nine gets here.

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Comments
  1. Beth says:

    Exactly my feelings on the matter Dean has a whole side to himself that he doesn’t share with anybody and being bisexual would explain a lot about the way he acts sometimes.

  2. Thea Karan says:

    So yeah, I agree with you on everything you said, exept two things:
    1. Not sure if Dean is bisexual. Again, I have to rewatch the show to really make my opinion, I just have never seen him like that.
    2. I think there is a lot of Dean’s view of himself in later seasons.

    Also, i HOPE TO GOD they don’t ACTUALLY make Destiel a real canon thing – again, I’ll have a more in length post about this on my blog when I reach the newer seasons, but I’ll just say this – No matter how good they make it (and they cannot make it really good) it will seem, like they included an SPN fanfiction into the show.

    • sammygirl1967 says:

      Ah, well, I really don’t see much of it – not that it isn’t there, but Dean’s feelings on himself haven’t really been focused heavily on, I suppose.

      Ah, God no! I’d never want them to make Destiel canon. Fanfiction is one thing (and when well-written, a very good and intriguing thing) but to make it canon… I really can’t see that actually working at all. It’s interesting to think about, but Dean and Cas’s relationship going beyond what it is would be really out of place on the show.

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