A Hollow Fantasy: Sam and Amelia’s “Love”

Posted: February 8, 2013 in Supernatural Musings, Theories and Headcannons
Tags: , , , , , , ,

I haven’t exactly been quiet or subtle about my hatred for Amelia Richardson. Her character is so poorly written and developed that it’s sad and I’m frankly amazed that there are people who like her. I’ve realized, though, that perhaps they like Amelia because of their own image of her in their minds and what she represents: Sam’s happiness.

Unfortunately, I can’t like her based on a few minutes of decent characterization that were soon flushed down the toilet and I refuse to make her into something she isn’t in my mind. Sam’s happiness matters little to me if the character is so poorly characterized that it doesn’t make sense.

I believe Amelia’s lack of characterization is in part due to lazy writing. Instead of giving her a personality and making Sam and Amelia’s love make any sense, they’ve simply put her there to serve as the thing that pulls Sam away from hunting and that’s basically all she does. The romance is not evident and she doesn’t get to have a real personality.

I have a couple of theories as to what exactly is really going on between the two of them…

The first is what I’m want to talk about now: They are not really in “love”

It’s pretty obvious, when you think about it. Sam has lost everything and everyone that has ever meant anything to him. He has no family left, he doesn’t have Bobby, he doesn’t have a way to get into Purgatory for Dean… He’s all alone.

And the one thing he’s always wanted is a normal, safe life. He had that at one point, at the beginning of the series. With Jessica Moore. And after losing EVERYTHING, Sam was desperate to get away from the life that had taken it from him.

Whenever he met Amelia, something in her reminded him of Jessica. Maybe it was the way that she smiled, maybe it was the bit of upfront, doesn’t-take-shit-from-anyone personality she displayed briefly in her first appearance. Whatever it was, it reminded him of happier times.

Their relationship was extremely rushed. Amelia even admits this herself whenever they buy a house together. It makes no sense to rush, seeing as they seemingly have all the time in the world to take things slow and, you know, get to know each other. They aren’t married, so why bother buying a house? Why rush into things?

Because Sam was desperately trying recreate what he’d lost with Jess. Remember, he was planning to ask Jessica to marry him and they were living together.

Amelia reminded Sam of Jessica and what he’d lost in some small way and after losing everything, that was enough for him. He just wanted to snatch hold of that little bit of happiness and never let it go.

“But Amelia loves Sam!” you say.

No. No she does not.

Not only does Amelia show very little actually “love” towards either Sam or Don, but that aside, have you ever stopped to listen to Sam and Amelia’s conversations? How flat they are? How lacking in real emotional depth?

Amelia, like Sam, had very recently had her entire world ripped out from under her. Her husband, who she presumably loved, was dead. She fled from that pain the same way Sam fled from his and whenever she met him, there was something in him and how lost he seemed that she connected with because she was just as lost.

Maybe he even reminded her of Don in some way. Either way, she was just as desperate to have that little bit of happiness. They were each other’s FANTASY.

They were both deluding themselves into believing that they loved one another, when it was so painfully obvious from the way they talked to one another that neither was truly emotionally invested in the other. (It’s particularly obvious in the way they talk to each other after having sex… They both sound so detached it’s like they’ve never met before)

Fantasies are never as good as reality and I think they were both aware of that. But they were unwilling and unable to give up that small bit of normalcy and happiness that they had created inside their own minds.

The reason that the fantasy lasted as long as it did? Because neither had a reason to stop deluding themselves. Don was dead and Dean was gone. Sam had no reason to go back to hunting and Amelia had no reason to not give in to her own fantasy.

Notice how quickly it all shatters whenever Don turns up? Amelia doesn’t look relieved, or even the slightest bit happy that the husband she said she loved so much wasn’t dead. She looks HORRIFIED. Because her fantasy is about to be shattered and Sam’s is going down with it.

Don broke the delusion. Suddenly, reality was breaking through and their “love” didn’t seem so great anymore. I think Sam recognized this and that’s why he decided to “do the right thing” and leave.

If you noticed, he himself didn’t seem so broken up about leaving Amelia. Sam’s the self-sacrificing type, I know, but I’m pretty sure if there had been any REAL love between him and Amelia, he’d have stayed and fought harder. It was more than a sense of doing “the right thing” and letting Amelia be happy (because she clearly didn’t LOOK happy) it was that he realized that his desperate attempt at recreating his former life with Jess had failed.

It’s obvious Sam cared, at least a little, about Amelia. But it wasn’t love, it was something more akin to friendship and most likely because of their mutual losses. Empathy was probably what created most of their “feelings” for each other in the first place.

And despite the fact that the entire relationship was a hollow sham, Sam still longs for that little bit of happiness that his fantasy gave him. So whenever Amelia, likely wanting things to go back to that happy time when she and Sam were blissfully deluded together, shows up and tells him she’ll be with him if he stays… he seriously considers it.

But he doesn’t do it. Because he knows that there is no going back. The illusion has been shattered and he knows, after that last night with Amelia, that there isn’t any way that things will ever be the same as they were.

This explains why they’re so stiff and detached when talking to one another, it explains why Amelia was so, for lack of a better word, flirty (in a painful and annoying way) in that hotel room. It explains why Sam always looks so sad whenever he’s talking to Amelia and it explains why Amelia was so willing to throw away her life with Don so callously.

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